Wednesday, January 22, 2014
I am knitting, I am knitttng with pink yarn, but I am not excited by it. I have almost finished the Clanger because it was very small and easy. I need to find some pink pipe cleaners to make the fingers and to shape the ears. I am not excited by this clanger though. I will be happy to finish him and to hand him over to his new owner and pleased to have brought some pleasure to some ones day. But my days are a tad lack lustre, the shine which I usually pride myself on finding in each moment is not there. The joy that comes from feeling right with the world, is not mine at the moment. This is a problem, because usually knitting fixes this for me, I makes me feel better and allows my brain to stop going so fast. But it's not working right now. NO indeed it is not. What to do? Perhaps a break is needed? Perhaps it's just about finding a project that is exciting? Or perhaps I just need the school year to start do I can get back into the groove and routine that will allow me to think again. I have loved the holidays but they are beginning to feel endless and I am beginning to feel guilty that they have not been filled with exciting experiences but have instead been spent you tubed and mine crafted to the max. It probably wont make any difference in the long run. I think there is a memory wipe that occurs at regular intervals so that children conveniently forget all you have done for them and with them in order for them to participate in being a teenager and hating you with every ounce of their being.