Friday, January 23, 2009

Courage

When I joined the navy two years ago I had no idea the impact that one of the core values would have on me. Courage.
I didn't realise that the navy would teach me how to stand up for myself, how to protect myself and ultimately how to have the courage to say enough. I didn't know that their emphasis on courage would resonate through my own life causing me to want to change things for the better. Of course it takes two to change a marriage and ours had been one of power and control for a long time. It was never going to be easy to realign the balance.
It takes a lot of courage to say no more even when you know it will cause pain to others.
I have found that courage.
2009 will be the year I teach my girls that insults and derogatory comments are not acceptable behaviours. I will teach them that emotional blackmail is unacceptable and that we all deserve to be loved and treated with dignity and respect. I wish I'd had the courage years ago.
It will be a courageous year.

23 comments:

Leonie said...

Congratulations on your revelation and good wishes for being able to carry it out. I hope that your children appreciate the effort it takes to change a lifetime worth of habits. It is more than worth it.

April said...

Just being to write that here is so very brave and courageous.

Good for you, wishing you love and faith to maintain the courage

Hugs

April xx

leah said...

What courage! I will be praying for you and your family!

Danette said...

My prayers will be with you. I have worked hard to teach my daughters the same things. My youngest is currently going through a divorce due to the same type of situation and revelation. I salute you both for your courage!

Thimbleanna said...

Wow Alison. Good for you. And good luck -- it sounds like some difficult changes are in store for you. On another subject, I love that 100 things to do post that you did -- I've been wanting to do that one too!

Willow said...

It is very hard to change ingrained habits. And you can't force other people. You can only change yourself. Blessings to you on your journy to be courageous! You were courageous to state your intent publicly and courageous to stand up for yourself.

Marcia said...

what a wonderful thing to teach your girls. I'm glad you've been able to learn courage for yourself too.

A Spoonful Of Sugar said...

Well done in making changes for the better - you are a great role model for your children. Take care.

Lin said...

So important to be able to do this, its great that you have the courage.

Adrienne said...

OH God Bless you! I will be praying for all of you to have courage. To change and to make changes indeed takes courgage. Stay strong and steadfast ~ God will take care of the rest.

Channon said...

Beautiful post, and good for you. Life lessons come up unexpectedly!

Jane said...

Good luck it will be a wonderful thing to achieve, Jane x

Mr Puffy's Knitting Blog: said...

If you don't respect yourself no one else will. That is an important lesson for us all to learn.

Congratulations on growing as a person and having the insight to know it was needed.

Kitty said...

Oh Ali ... have a huge (((((hug)))))

I had the same revelation about 4 years ago. I realised that it was time to show my kids how to live - that telling them wasn't enough. I had to walk the walk, not just talk the talk.

You will be better for your bravery. I'm thinking of you.

xxxx

Indigo Blue said...

Can not have been an easy post to write. I am very lucky in that I have not needed to make a change such as this and I wish you and your daughters the happiness that you rightly should have.
Take care.
xx

a friend to knit with said...

i totally respect you for your COURAGE!
......i wish you nothing but the best........life is short.....and we must try to enjoy every precious moment.

Tracy said...

Applaus and admiration for your courage...and for instilling the values of courage in your children. They will carry them into the world and on to their own children...Amazing to consider, isn't it? Happy Days to you all ((HUGS)) So glad to see you stopped in to join my giveaway fun this week--great to see you! :o)

LizzieJane said...

Good for you Alison, and what a wonderful thing to teach your children.
x

Wool Winder said...

I don't know you well enough to comment on this except to say it makes me sad to hear your marriage is not a good one and that it is ending.

Alison Gibbs said...

Congratulations on being so couragous. Many women don't find that inner strength and you should be so proud of yourself for having that strength and courage.
Now it's time for a wonderful future for you and your girls
Alison

Rachael Rabbit said...

Lovely post which I think will give everyone who reads it a little bit of courage to do the same xx

Renee said...

Good for you for having the courage to take the brave road. You're in our prayers. Every day will be stronger and better. {{Hugs}}

Leanne said...

What a great life lesson you will be giving your girls.